Christmas Shopping is Better When There are Two
by DryadSpeaks
Summary: Spinoff of All My Dreams Chapter 63 and The Smile on Your Face Chapter 46.  Artie and Quinn go Christmas shopping at the mall, where they run into an elf and a giant gingerbread man.  And Rachel.  Full of holiday Quartie fluff!


"Artie, are you sure we should be doing this? I mean...how would you feel if the situation were reversed?" Quinn asked, looking concerned, as they approached the Santa's Workshop section of the mall.

Artie stopped. "If the situation were reversed, he would already have about 200 pictures of me in my elf costume, and they would be all over the internet and school."

As they turned the corner to the part of the mall where Santa was usually set up, Quinn grabbed Artie's arm, announcing that, if he was going to take pictures, he wasn't allowed to spread them all over everywhere.

"Fine. BUT! If ANYTHING out of the ordinary happens, I get to put three pictures on Facebook. I won't tag him."

She grinned. "Deal. Now...see him anywhere?"

As they were scouring the area for AJ, something caught Artie's eye.

"Hold up. Is that a giant gingerbread man?" he asked, as Quinn stood on her toes to see over the crowd."

"Um...yes, I think it is. And it's moving, which means there's probably someone in there. I can't see AJ anywhere."

Artie grinned. "I know who that is."

"Who?" Quinn asked, looking puzzled.

Artie grinned wider. "Who do we know that's tall like that?"

Quinn's eyes widened. "That's...Martin? I thought he wouldn't be caught dead here!"

"Well, technically I think he said he wouldn't be an elf. I did not think he'd haul out Gingy. We need to find out what's going on here."

"Wait...Gingy? You know about this thing?" She stared at him, slightly shocked.

"Yeah, don't you remember? Last year he wore that thing to school ALL THE TIME and randomly ran around the halls chasing people."

The realization dawned on Quinn. "That was Martin? I thought that was that weird kid from the AV Club?"

"Um...yeah. Martin is 'that weird kid from the AV Club,' apparently." He tried not to let his amusement at the expression on Quinn's face show.

"But he's not weird! I mean...if you had said AJ dressed up as a giant gingerbread man at school, that would have been believable...but Martin?"

Artie shrugged. "He thought he needed to spice things up a little."

Quinn laughed. "Apparently!"

"That joke totally missed its mark, didn't it? Did you get that? Gingerbread man? 'Spice things up?' Gingerbread is a type of spice cookie?"

"Yes, I got that, but it was so pathetic that I chose to ignore it," she said, rolling her eyes. "Good thing you're adorable...it makes your terrible jokes bearable."

He smiled. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw an elf that looked familiar. He gestured to Quinn, who confirmed that it was AJ.

Just as he was about to say something, AJ saw them, and walked over.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, looking slightly uncomfortable. Artie couldn't figure out why...it's not like AJ could be a mall elf without seeing people he knew.

"More importantly...what's Gingy doing here?" Artie asked, looking amused.

"Oh...the kid that dresses up like a candy cane is sick today, so Santa asked if I knew anyone that might come fill in. Of course, gigantor over there is too tall for the candy cane, so I made him bring Gingy. They like him so much that I think they're going to offer him a job."

Quinn laughed. "I thought he said he would never work here?"

AJ shrugged. "Come on...we know how much he loves to wear Gingy in public."

Quinn turned to Artie. "I take back what I said earlier."

Artie laughed, and grabbed the camera to snap a picture of AJ's attire. Much to Artie's amusement, the costume was complete with pointy ears, and shoes with bells on them.

"What are you guys doing? We have a lunch break in half an hour. Food court?"

Artie and Quinn agreed, and left AJ to get back to his elf duties.

Quinn turned to Artie. "You're never going to let either of them live this down, are you?"

Artie shrugged. "AJ, yes. Martin? Probably never."

* * *

While they waited for Martin and AJ to be on break, Quinn suggested that they check out a couple of the stores near the food court to see if they could find gifts for the people on their lists. She dragged him into a small and very fancy home decor store, announcing that she was looking for something for her mother.

"How about this?" Artie said, for the tenth time, holding up a decorative pillow. "Oh...never mind...this pillow is almost $100. It's a pillow, yo! How is it this expensive?"

She laughed. "Funny you should pick THAT pillow...she already has two of them. They're on that white couch in the living room."

He threw the pillow back onto the display, and looked for the next thing he could grab and suggest. He really hated shopping, especially in tiny expensive stores where it felt like the people working there were constantly watching everyone in the store. Did they think he'd try and shoplift a pillow under his chair?

"How about these? Wait...what are these?" he said, holding up a small box.

"Artie, those are napkin rings. I can't give her those! 'Merry Christmas, Mom! I got you these napkin rings.'"

Artie grinned. "Hey...it's the thought that counts?"

"Yeah, and nothing says I love you like a set of napkin rings." She had a final look at the last display case. "Let's get out of here. I can't find anything. I also can't find anything for your mom."

"Wait...we were looking for my mom? I thought we were looking for yours?"

She grinned. "We were, but I also thought we'd see if there was anything for your mom. Did you see anything you thought she might like?"

He thought for a moment. "Um...no. If I gave her a $100 couch pillow, she'd probably hit me over the head with it and then insist I return it."

Quinn laughed. "It's 11:50. We still have ten minutes before they're on break. Want to go to that bookstore next door?"

"Sure. Maybe I can find something for someone there."

As they entered the bookstore, Artie made his way over to a display of cookbooks. "I wonder if Mom would like a cookbook?" he said, grabbing one from the pile.

"Maybe," she said. "Does she use cookbooks?"

"I...don't know," he said. "I've never actually seen her use one, but I know she has some."

"Let's look around. We can always come back."

"I..." Artie was cut off by two large brown arms wrapping around him from behind.

"Martin! Gingy smells like mothballs. Get off!"

Quinn turned around, just in time to see Martin remove his arms from around Artie's shoulders. She grinned. "Hey Martin! Enjoying your new job?"

Martin grumbled something that sounded suspiciously like "Stupid AJ." Before he had a chance to add anything to this, AJ came racing up beside him.

"Thanks for leaving without me. I had to ask a little old lady if she saw a giant gingerbread man around here somewhere. I think she thought I was insane."

Martin grinned, having removed the head part of his costume. "And she'd be right about that."

Artie and Quinn laughed, and AJ threw his hat at Martin.

"At least I'm not dressed up like food!"

Martin smirked. "No, you're just wearing Vulcan ears and shoes with bells on them."

"These aren't Vulcan ears...they're specifically for elves. My Vulcan ears are bigger..." he trailed off. "You know...if I had Vulcan ears."

Everyone laughed, and they left the bookstore and headed for the food court.

* * *

"Martin, can you take that thing off? I can smell it from here!" Artie said, moving closer to Quinn and further away from Martin.

"No...it's too much work. What do you expect? Gingy has been stored in a closet since last year! I didn't really have time to properly air him out before I came here. I couldn't wear the candy cane...that kid is like 2 feet shorter than I am."

"He's also way skinnier," AJ piped in.

Martin glared at him. "Didn't they have to let out the pants of your elf costume?"

AJ's face reddened slightly. "They just had an odd fit. I didn't want ANYONE seeing that much definition, ok?"

Quinn and Artie exchanged a look of amusement, before bursting out laughing.

As they sat there eating, Quinn watched the three men she was with interact with each other. AJ dominated most of the conversation, as usual, and Martin sat there quietly. She couldn't help but notice how hard Artie was trying not to say something to AJ to get him to be quiet. It was kind of cute. He looked annoyed and amused at the same time. Like he wasn't sure whether he should encourage the conversation, or smack AJ across the back of the head.

As AJ told a story about how a kid almost threw up on Santa, she noticed that Martin wasn't paying attention to any of them. She turned a bit, to see what he was staring at. Rachel was inside the bookstore they had left a few minutes earlier.

"You should just go talk to her," she said, leaning in so the others wouldn't hear. AJ had moved chairs so that he was sitting beside Artie, and was clearly very engrossed in detailing every single child that had visited Santa that day.

"I can't. I'm dressed like a gingerbread man," he said, shifting his gaze. "Besides...even if I wasn't, what about me would make her be interested in me?"

"Martin! How can you even ask that? You have to try!" She realized that her voice was slightly louder than intended, and leaned in further. "She's by herself. Just go. Oh, and also...didn't you know that she and Finn broke up?"

Martin started at her. "Serious? No, I didn't know that. Now I really can't go...I'll be the creeper in the gingerbread suit who hits on girls right after they break up with their boyfriends!" He slumped back in his chair.

"Then don't hit on her. Go talk to her. Ask her if she wants to join us. You know her now, so I don't think that's considered being a creeper!"

He reluctantly agreed, and got up. AJ and Artie turned their attention to Quinn.

"Where's he going?" Artie asked, gesturing after him.

"Look in the bookstore," she said, turning to watch. Martin talked to Rachel for a minute or so, before the two of them left the store and headed towards the table.

"Hello everyone! How are you today? Martin just found me in the bookstore and suggested I come join you," she said, taking a seat.

Martin remained standing. "Can I get you something?" he asked, shifting as though he were slightly uncomfortable.

"Oh, no thank you, I just had lunch," she said. "I was just in the bookstore looking to see if they have any books about writing your own show tunes. They did not, but suggested that I try the internet."

The conversation continued for a few minutes, before she finally noticed what Martin and AJ were wearing.

"Are you working at Santa's Village? Why are you dressed up like a burlap sack with buttons on it?"

Artie almost choked on the french fry he had just put in his mouth. Quinn looked over to make sure he was alright, and caught his eye by mistake. She had to look away so she wouldn't start laughing.

As Martin was about to say something, AJ cut in. "He's a gingerbread man. Dude, put on your head so she can see!"

"No, I think that won't be necessary," Martin said, his face turning a deep shade of pink.

"Martin, please, put your head on! I want to see you in all your gingerbread glory!" Rachel said, smiling.

Reluctantly, he stood up, and placed the head over his own. Rachel clapped her hands, announcing that she could see now that he was clearly a gingerbread man.

"Yeah, he's replacing the kid in the candy cane costume," AJ blurted, "but he was too tall and too fat to fit that costume. He keeps this one at his house."

Martin hastily removed the gingerbread man head from his shoulders, and threw it at AJ, knocking him sideways off his chair.

"Stay down there for a few minutes, and stop being an ass," he said, reaching down to grab the head back. AJ didn't say anything, but he also didn't get up from under the table.

Artie leaned down. "He's just kidding. Get off the floor. You kind of look like an idiot. And I think you lost a Vulcan ear."

"They're ELF ears! I already told you, the Vulcan ones are bigger!" AJ whispered harshly, righting himself in his seat.

After this, the conversation quieted down. They talked a bit about what Rachel was doing for the holidays, and what Quinn and Artie were doing at the mall. Eventually, Martin announced that they had to be getting back to Santa.

As he stood to leave, he turned to Rachel. "Before I go, and feel free to say no, but do you think you might want to go for a coffee sometime?"

Rachel's eyes lit up. "Yes, I would love to do that. What time are you finished today? Did you want it to be today?"

Martin smiled, a look of relief spreading across his face. "I'm finished at 3. How does that sound?"

Rachel jumped up. "That sounds great!" she said, awkwardly hugging the gingerbread-clad boy.

"Has anyone told you you smell like mothballs?" she said, stepping back.

"Yup, been there, done that," Artie piped up from his seat beside Quinn. "He didn't have time to air Gingy out."

"Ahh, I see. Of course that makes perfect sense, seeing as you had such short notice to get here! I really must be going, as I have several things to do before we meet for coffee at 3. Should I meet you at Santa's place?"

Martin grinned. "Sure. AJ, come on. We have to go."

AJ stood up, ear in hand. "Can you help me with this? I can't get it to stay."

Martin grabbed the ear, shoved it on his friend, and they were off. As they were leaving, Rachel also prepared to leave.

"I will see you later, Artie, Quinn?" she said, grabbing her bag. "I have several stops to make before I meet Martin for coffee. He's so nice!" She was practically gushing.

"Sure, we'll see you at some point, I'm sure," Quinn said. "We should go too. Lots of shopping to do."

After Rachel was gone, Artie turned to Quinn.

"What did you say to him that made him go get her?"

Quinn shrugged. "I just told him to go get her. Simple as that."

Artie grinned. "Like I've said before, I love it when you take charge."

"I know you do. Come on, let's go find some gifts!"

* * *

In the end, their shopping trip was a success. Quinn found a set of beautifully engraved serving bowls that matched her mother's kitchen decor perfectly. She knew they would probably not be used very frequently, but there was a place on the buffet where she was fairly certain her mother would display them. They were gorgeous, and she just couldn't pass them up.

Artie bought a couple of books for Michael, and a set of telescoping screwdrivers for his dad. He had some trouble finding something for Lindsay, but finally settled on a kit that would allow her to decorate the walls in her room with removable felt pens.

"Mom did tell her we could paint in there, she just never specified what that needed to be like. With these, she can do whatever she wants, and she doesn't like it we can just wash it off."

"Speaking of your mom, have you decided what to get her?" she said, placing yet another bag in his lap.

"Yeah, I have. I'm going to need some help though. You in?"

She grinned. "That depends on what it is."

He gestured toward the art section of the store they were in. "See those gigantic frames? I want to get one of those and make a collage of family pictures for her. But...I can't carry that out to the car, and I'm pretty sure I'm not artistic enough to make a nice-looking collage."

"Artie...that's perfect! Of course I'll help!" she tried not to let him see that she had teared up a bit. He was so thoughtful.

"Great! Let's go! Oh, and one more thing. Woman, I am not your shopping cart! What is this bag?"

She laughed. "Just some stuff I got for some people. Don't look inside. And if I'm going to carry that frame, you're going to need to take these bowls too," she said, passing the box to him. "How are we going to fit that into my car?"

He thought for a moment. "It should fit on the back seat. My chair goes in the trunk anyway, and we don't have that much other stuff."

She agreed that they could make it work, and they went to purchase the frame.

Eventually they made their way out to the car, Quinn carrying the surprisingly heavy frame and Artie attempting to not drop any of their purchases in the parking lot.

Once everything was loaded into the car, Artie turned to her.

"Thanks for coming with me. You were right...it's way more fun with two."

She grinned, and placed a kiss on the top of his head.

"I know. Everything is more fun with two when it's the two of us."

**A/N: To those of you that were expecting this: I hope it lived up to your expectations!**

**Be on the lookout for a series of holiday-themed oneshots over the next couple of weeks! They probably won't all be as long as this one, but I will try to churn them out as fast as possible.**

**...unless you guys want me to stop.**

**In which case...I will churn them out even faster just to be a pain.**

**And remember...I love reviews! I think as an early Christmas present to me, all of you who read but never review should click that review button and leave me a few words!**

**I would also love it if you'd join us in the Quinn/Artie Forum (we are now #2 on the list!) and in the Quartie Community.**


End file.
